Prove it

I enter our kitchen after a long day’s work. It’s a cold November night, already dark outside. My phone starts ringing – I can feel it vibrating in my purse. I fumble for it, finally finding it. I glance at the screen. I’m relieved to see that it’s Mark. He’s in Minneapolis on business, doing audit work for one of his many Minnesota clients. His schedule is demanding when he’s out of town. So I’m glad for the opportunity to talk to him – the days are long, and the nights are longer sometimes in my state of intense grief, especially when Mark’s away. Continue reading

Mother’s Day musings (one week late)

I figured I’d try to write about this, albeit one week late… Since starting my blog I have yet to write a detailed post about how I’ve processed any of the major holidays… The best I’ve been able to do is put little blurbs about each one of them into my “random happenings” posts. I feel like a giant failure as a blogger in this regard, because after losing a child (or going through anything deeply traumatic), holidays tend to bring up so many emotions, piercing the heart in new, excruciatingly painful ways, so I should be writing about at least some of them as I share my grief journey, amiright? But truthfully, most holidays have left me too breathless and exhausted to do so. Continue reading

Jay – umbilical cord pathology scan 1

We had our first umbilical cord pathology scan for Jay on April 27. Short update – fortunately, no cord issues were noted. But we realize the cord will continue to move, which is why we’ll be looking at it a few more times, though fingers crossed each appointment will be equally uneventful to this one. If you’re interested in more details about my appointment and what the actual scan entailed, read on… Continue reading